1. Think how silly fruitcake is. Think of times when you received fruitcake as a gift. Draw fruitcakes. Contemplate why there are hard things in a cake. Who designed fruitcakes? A dentist?
2. Be grateful for all you have. There are so many who are less fortunate. Oh no. You are empathic so now you are thinking of those who are unfortunate. You can FEEL their pain. Now you feel deep guilt. Maybe you shouldn’t have so much. Maybe you feel guilty for not having more and WANTING more. And those poor people. No, don’t think about the whole gratefulness thing. Just go to the next one.
3. Avoid holiday music unless it is by Bing Crosby or Nat King Cole. Those dudes could really kick it. Dreamy, right?
4. Count the amount of people on Facebook that go on and on about the real meaning of Christmas and how YOU are so materialistic because you like gifts and cookies. Now laugh at them as you eat your sprinkled-laden gingerbread while playing with your new computer.
5. Drive around and watch blinking lights in the neighborhood houses and have mini seizures like the kids in Japan who watched crazy animation.
6. See how many people you can knock down in the sale aisles. Like bowling. Better yet, head to Walmart and see how many people and carts can fit into one teeny tiny narrow aisle. One? Two? Three? Four?!
7. Don’t listen to I’ll Be Home for the Holidays. I warned you on this one. Just don’t. Whoever wrote that song is a sadist.
8. Treat yourself to a fairy alphabet deck. (Oh c’mon, I had to throw in one of my products, right? And sign up for a class at an early bird rate. Oh now, I am really pushing it, eh?)
9. Watch Rudolph and laugh and repeat “I want to be a dentist,” about a million times. I just love that line! You can hang out with the Misfit Toys and not feel different. Dang it, I want to find that island! Road Trip!
10. Have a happy holiday, how ever happy looks to you, even if it is sitting under a tree in the middle of the forest with a color pencil set.
Happy Holidays from,