In Arizona right now, there is a law sitting on the Governor’s desk that will allow businesses to discriminate and not serve those that are gay based on religious beliefs. This legislation got me thinking about labels and how we perceive people when we only look at the surface.
Years back, I had an experience when I overheard an acquaintance tell her friend I was “flighty.” I had a legitimate reaction: I almost whacked her with my wand. Being a sensitive person I have two forms of reactions in my arsenal: I either want to smack people over the head and get bitchy, or I feel hurt. (I usually feel both). And yes I have wings that I only show my dearest and closest friends, so I can take flight sometimes when I need to, but being called flighty pissed me off. This woman knew me at a time when my whole life was crumbling, my beloved dog, Foxy, was in the process of leaving this world, my family was crumbling, and what this woman saw was my world’s ungrounded-ness. She, not knowing me well or knowing any of this, only saw the surface and made an assessment.
The definition of “flighty” found online: “not serious or dependable” “irresponsible” “flakey”
I equate flighty with being ditzy, which would be really nice, as you are never weighed down with thoughts. (Finally, a good night’s sleep!) Ditzy equals lightheaded, not all there, a not super bright kind of formula. I wouldn’t want to be labeled that, ever. The truth of the matter is there isn’t a moment that I’m not thinking three thousand thoughts, including analyzing the meaning of the life while trying to figure out the formula for the back of Post-it paper. And like most sensitive empaths, I’m overly responsible feeling like it’s up to me to make sure most of the world’s population is happy and fully taken care of.
If we believe in magical things like fairies and the light, imaginative, happy part of this crazy world, are we then seen as ditzy and not down to earth? Are we prejudiced against? What if Arizona businesses had signs that said “No folks that believe in anything magical allowed here.” How would these businesses even know we thought this unless we carried a sign saying so?
Now, I can understand why she might have felt that way about me. I can look very ungrounded, flying around the room with a ton of hummingbird energy. That is my natural energy reserve because I am just plain excited and passionate about what this planet seems to offer. But I guarantee my head is not in the clouds but is in a planning/organizing stage. And give me sugar or caffeine and my sensitive, little body will be hanging from the ceiling lamp making giggling noises and I’ll be talking a mile a minute. I can also get overwhelmed with too much information coming in all at once which can give me that glossed-over look.
Over at my Facebook page I have my featured cupcake of the day and I like to share pictures of fairies and sweet dogs smiling. Does that mean I am flighty and not seriously dealing with the big life issues of the day? Nope, the opposite. It’s because I have felt and lived the depth of this world — deep pain, deep love, deep hurt, deep everything — that I know how crucial it is to share the good so we don’t get loss in that pain.
So before we label anyone inaccurately, we need to remember we are only judging the surface, and by labeling, much like those signs that might go up in Arizona restaurants, all we are doing is keeping so many others out, and missing out on the beautiful experience of seeing their greater depth.
*And many of us have experienced prejudice and labeling about just being sensitive or highly intuitive