Everything that happens in my life is one big spiritual lesson, and therefore, writing material. I was forced to ask myself the question yesterday, in a round-about way, Do we have to be positive all the time to be spiritual and a positive force to others?
I love my parents deeply but my Dad is the type of person who always says, “Just tell me the positive things.” Growing up in that kind of environment I learned the lovely art of repression. This showed itself as minor physical ailments which we all shared as a family. Fact: I rarely cried until I was 14 and my dog died, and when I did, my whole family was in shock. That’s really sad.
You see, the “nasties” which is our humanness, has to go somewhere. I am sure when I was all light and spiritual on the Other Side, I was all positive all the time. Pop me in a body and especially one week in the month I will be hormonally affected and may not see the world in the best light. (It’s scary when I drive at that time.)
I can’t imagine not having moments when I release bits of anger, frustration, ugliness, un-spiritual thoughts, etc. I’d be like a coke bottle shaken up too many times ready to release. I’d probably end up like one of those folks that plows down a ton of people in a post office while the news reports, “She was such a nice person. Never bothered anyone. Never caused any trouble.”
I don’t know about you, but I don’t trust spiritual teachers that don’t have some humanness in them. When they make mistakes and their lives have areas that don’t work, I relate to them. When they are perfect and quote beautiful sayings all the time, I grow suspicious. What’s behind the curtain?
One of my best friends is an angel reader who says the “f-bomb” often in our private conversations. We often kid she could advertise as the reader who curses.
I won’t apologize for my bitchy, human moments. Sometimes I learn the most from them. I even was inspired to write a entry that landed in my new ebook, Spiritual Perfectionism, problem and tool #40.
Part of my healing is to not to recreate my repression-filled childhood. You can say what you want to me, and your journey is different than mine. What you believe and works for you is also different. But I won’t do that to myself, and maybe, that question posed to me yesterday, was just reminding me of that, so I wouldn’t.