I haven’t posted in my art blog. I haven’t wanted to as much. But I wrote a more “aware” post over there regarding a great book by Sonia Choquette and an exercise in following your spirit here.
I am amazed how much my body talks! After getting over the cough and throat clearing, my daughter came home with the cough the other day. Now I’m sneezing. Maybe it’s allergies, which is possible, except when I checked in I learned I was still clearing! Man, is it done yet???? I mean, I know we are growing to a new vibration, etc. etc., but I want to feel better! I felt all this, then I went to sleep. I had an amazing dream. I was with my Mom in my childhood house (hmm, childhood), and a man came to the door wanting us to vote on a poll. He had a flashing sign (there’s your sign), it said, TRIBAL BELIEFS or MAGIC.
I scanned the net for info on TRIBAL BELIEFS and read about relating to root chakra, etc. And then I read an article from a book on a man who was dying rather than rest and take care of himself. He was working himself to death for the sake of his family. Well, something in that resonate because I began to have a coughing fit. I kept coughing and dripping and I was like, Okay, I get it! I’ve been learning–slowly–how to balance taking care of myself with taking care of others/giving. I am trying to stop justifying my overconcern with working and putting out too much. My Guides just call it “striving.” I think it’s alot of stuff I adopted from my Mom, who was very accomplished, but overly concerned with acchievement. Her back would be hurting, she’d feel sick, but darnit, she’d still go to work and bring work home.
The magic part…I am witnessing a different way to do everything. What we all know is the gift of manifesting, allowing, trusting, etc. All the stuff we’ve been taught lately. But I’ve had a hard time letting go of the old way and embrace the new way. (Ha ha, much like the country!) There’s that fear, the what if’s. And that fear has been strong. I guess it is all a process.